April 17, 2000 New Thinking:
Daddy
Subject Classification
Reader Feedback
Subscribing
Unsubscribing
2006
2005
2004
2003
2002
2001
2000
1999
1998
1997
1996
Books by
Gerry McGovern
Content Critical
Gaining competitive advantage through high-quality web content
The Web
Content
Style Guide
The essential guide
for online writers, editors and managers
April 17, 2000
Daddy
By Gerry McGovern
Let’s imagine that it was Elian Gonzalez’s father who drowned while attempting to bring him to America. Let’s imagine that his mother wanted Elian to come back to Cuba. Would Elian still be in America with his distant relations? I doubt it.
The Cuban-American relationship is a minefield I don’t care to enter. However, what I would like to explore is the father-child relationship, and more particularly how that is viewed in both a social and legal context.
It would seem that those involved in keeping Elian in the United States were certain that secretly his father wanted Elian to stay there too. Not alone this, they seemed sure that if they could bring the father to the United States, then the father would want to stay too.
It hasn’t quite worked out that way. Juan Gonzalez, it would seem, does not want what others feel certain is the best thing for him and the child. Whether Juan Gonzalez accepts it or not, these others know that America is the best place for his child, and his rights as a father simply don’t count.
I thought the Internet was supposed to bring us closer together? What a joke! The old enmities fester in the old pot. I thought change was supposed to drag behind it progress, but progress is a mongrel dog. I thought this whole information society was supposed to make us more informed, so that we could do the right thing?
The average man has never felt more alienated and at sea. We were trained to be warriors, survivors and bread-winners, but those traits are often out-of-place in this brain over brawn information economy. We need to adapt but there’s so much change. Young men all around the world are committing suicide at an alarming rate. (Up to four times more young men commit suicide than young women.)
Men want the right and the room to change, to become more caring and to stay at home with their children more. A 1993 US Census Bureau found that 1.5 million men had primary responsibility for their young children. Kyle D. Pruett in his book, Fatherneed, draws on long-term studies to show that children are better balanced if both parents are actively involved in bringing them up. Particularly, Pruett shows that children who are actively involved with their fathers from birth through adolescence develop more emotional balance, stronger curiosity, and greater self-assurance.
Let’s make something clear here. Pointing out that men and fathers have rights is in no way attempting to deny or take away rights from women. Providing everyone their fair share of rights should be the ultimate objective of a civilized society.
At Paris airport this morning I awaited to clear customs. A couple with a young boy, roughly the same age as Elian Gonzalez, were in front of me. The mother kissed the father who awkwardly rubbed her shoulder. Then she bent down and kissed and hugged her son, who gripping tightly his teddy bear, burst into tears as he and his father walked through the metal detector. Sobbing, the boy waved a limp arm at his mother, as he and his father walked towards their plane. The father kept fumbling with a bag, embarrassed, unsure what to do.
Gerry McGovern
Next issue:
Suburban, sub-rural, sub-city
Previous issue:
Freedom of information
New Thinking homepage
New Thinking Newsletter
Subscribe to this free weekly newsletter covering the role and function of content on the Web.
More info | Privacy policy
Read the current issue
Content management seminar feedback
"Gerry's presentation was very well received by the more than 400 higher education delegates. I've chaired this meeting since 1994 and very few speakers have generated the same level of enthusiasm. Wit and wisdom is always an unbeatable combination."
Bob Johnson, American Marketing Association
“Excellent presenter ... thought-provoking and relevant. I hope we can persuade him to visit us again one day.”
Malcolm Davison
The British Association of Communicators in Business
"Hearing Gerry McGovern speaking, one can feel that he truly masters the subject of content management. He was voted ‘best speaker of the conference’ by delegates."
Toon Lowette
European Association of Directory Publishers
Find out more about Gerry McGovern's seminars
The average man has never felt more alienated and at sea.
Home - >What's New - About - Solutions - Clients - >Publications - Contact - Search
Tel: +353 87 238 6136
Email: info@gerrymcgovern.com
Privacy Policy
Copyright © Gerry McGovern. All rights reserved.